There wouldn't be a population problem if we didn't push popularity so much

I bought my new monster LCD television for my bedroom this weekend and on the way home, my roommate and I had a the following conversation:

Amber: I wonder what I'm going to wear tonight?
Nick: Well, clothes would be good.
Amber: (sigh) I know...this isn't South Beach after all.
Nick: (laughing) Amber, we have to be able to get into the place.
Amber: Trust me, we'd still get in.
Nick: (silence)

He hasn't figured out when I'm kidding and when I'm serious.

Another conversation, same day:

A guy walks into a bar...stands next to his girlfriend...who is VERY surprised to see him there. Girlfriend turns around to a cute guy in the group and says "He's not my boyfriend"

You know who you are :-)

This is why I keep a diary. I can't make this stuff up!! Well, i could...but that would be a waste of social experiments. And we all know, I'm a big fan of conducting my own social experiments.

Wanted: Slumpbuster

Yes, I know what a slumpbuster is, but it's not what I really mean. I need some blog material...thus a slumpbuster for blogger's block.

Geri said that I have a lot of material to pull from since I've had a rather crazy summer. A lot of changes going on and I did a lot of fun stuff and some naughty. However, a lot of what I've done could get me and a lot of people in trouble. So obviously I'm going to keep it all to myself. I have a diary in my nightstand. If anything ever happens to me, someone burn it. Seriously. It could destroy lives. Look what it's done to me.

One thing I've learned about myself. I hate being 'setup' by friends. One of my friends, Mark, who has known me for years...YEARS people...found out I was single again. O.M.G. he had the perfect guy for me. An engineer at a big oil company downtown, great guy, good looking blah blah blah. Pumped me up right? Well, my boss worked for the big oil company a while back so I had the stud 'checked out'. The contact person actually said to my boss that she didn't know he dated women. WTF?!!? Oh hell no. If co-workers are questioning your orientation...no thanks. I want a guy kind of guy. Not someone who knows more about decor and fashion than I do. I fake the fashion plate knowledge a lot and have to check with Posey on a couple things.

So anyway, I let the issue die with my Mark. I hint around to some of my other friends in that circle that I'm not ready to date. Whew, that was a close one. Just when I think I'm in the clear a few weeks later, he calls and wants me to meet this guy. Ok, now I'm pissed. Not only does he know I'm not wanting to date, I'm having this guy crammed down my throat. (watch the dirty minds here folks) I don't wanna and I'm throwing a fit and stamping my feet in my office trying to get out of it.

"Fine. FINE! I'll go. I'll meet you at Pub Fiction, but I can't stay long since I have Yoga at 8."

I'm dedicated to my yoga. Plus that one hot guy at the gym is a real incentive. There are several, but I'm stalking one. Hmmm, conveinent that you want to use the same machine....uh even though there are about 20 other treadmills....I want THIS one too.

I walk in. (To Pub Fiction, not the gym. ha!) The guy is my height and probably my weight. Yeah, he's lookin a wee bit weak. It was like pulling teeth to get a conversation out of the guy. I don't do shy men. He notices my new pink Razr, and sees the photo of my cat. He says "Wow, I feel a sneezing attack coming on just thinking about cats. I'm so allergic!" That's it! That's my out. I don't date weenies allergic to cats. And I bolt.

So I go on a date not too long ago. He asks me,

"Do I look familiar?"

"No, why? Are you famous or something?"

"No, I was dating your friend (name deleted) a while back and saw you at a party."

Stony silence and me just staring at him.

"Ah crap"

So that was the end of that date.

I'm moving to Austin or something. I'm not having any luck here.