Dressing Rooms: Fun House Mirrors of Horror

Have you gone into a dressing room to try on a bunch of neat stuff you find only to leave in disgust because you can’t get past how horrible your legs looked in the shorts? Or that your stomach ballooned out somehow between the time it took to pick out a bikini and trying it on? I was convinced I couldn’t possibly be in that bad of shape…

I’ve figured out the culprit: Lighting in the dressing rooms.

Hear me out. I was shopping at lunch and I noticed that my legs and ass didn’t look near as bad as I thought. Especially compared to other dressing rooms. The harsh fluorescent lighting in most stores accentuates EVERY lump on my body. How many times have I tried on a pair of shorts or a bikini in all my years only to walk out because it looked like crap in the dressing room? MANY. A lot of stores have lost a lot of sales because they fail to put the extra effort into lighting.

Note to clothing retailers: Invest in something that will actually make a difference like good lighting, instead of sending me mountain of coupons I can only use on the 32nd day of Neveruary for a 5% discount if I spend $100.

If I feel good about buying that lime green and orange bikini because I look phenomenal in it while in the dressing room….then you’ve done your job retailers. Because so far, you suck at this marketing thing.

I don’t have a beach body. I have more of a doughy lake body. Aim for THAT market, b!tches!